The Man With The One-Eyed Cat & Dog

What are the odds of that!

I could be talking about anything and everything. It could be the next race at Newmarket or someone considering that life insurance policy. You know, one of those patronising TV adverts where the actors pretend (I hope) they have Alzheimer’s disease.

There used to be a bloke who lived up the road. Actually, just around the corner in a bungalow. He was a postman. He was a very strange character. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but there was something missing (from his brain). His character trait was being obnoxious, confrontational and just a madman in the making. Thankfully, he didn’t deliver to our door very often but I’d pity the poor souls who were on his route. On one occasion I heard a tremendous knocking at the front door. It was as if someone was hitting the door with a hammer.

I said: ‘Who on Earth is that?’

Surprise surprise it was him.

I didn’t say anything but realised he wasn’t normal.

We used to have a pet dog, a lovely border collie called Blue. He went for his daily walk over the local playing field, literally 50 metres from our door. The postman took his dog over there. I used to keep out of the way as I wasn’t interested in chatting with an idiot but pitied his dog as it couldn’t be a place you would want to live.

For all I knew it lived a life of milk and honey.

However, one day the dog was off its lead and ran over to Blue. I noticed the dog had one eye. I thought it was kind of strange but considered it must have had an accident or something. Who knows. I wasn’t going to ask. It was sewed up and must have gone to the vets.

What are the odds of that?

Not millions to one but probably hundreds.

I wouldn’t want to bet on your pet dog having one eye or pre empt a gamble that your pet would lose one of its mince pies.

But you get the idea.

Poor dog.

About a week later, I walked into town and had to pass the crazy postman’s house. I didn’t think too much about it. As I passed, I saw he had a cat sitting in the garden. I can’t remember what it looked like. It might have been a lucky black cat. To my surprise it looked round as I passed and it had one eye!

It’s a coincidence, I guess.

The odds of a person having a cat and dog with one eye must be a rare sight. It must be millions to one. I couldn’t help wonder what was the story about the one eyed cat and dog because there most certainly must have been a story to be told.

Did they lose an eye at the hands of a punchy postman?

I shouldn’t imagine as it doesn’t go to a pretty place.

The next time you go to the casino and bet on a single number on the roulette with odds of 35/1 please take a moment to consider how your odds compare to other bets or aspects of life.

When someone says: ‘That’s a one in a million happening!’

Just say have you ever met a bloke with a one-eyed cat and dog?

Poor things.

Photo: Pixabay (free) & Canva (free)